This week I am visiting my mother. My two children are with me, so they are visiting their grandmother. Essentially we are all currently in a house with two mothers, and two sets of daughters. I find navigating within our different roles difficult. I am my mother’s daughter, but I am also my daughters’ mother. Who are the adults and who are the children? Who makes the rules? Who decides what we will do, and when? Who is in charge and who is not? It’s tricky. I am a guest here, but I am also a grown woman. A grown woman who feels exactly like a child when she is back in her mother’s house. With all of a child’s uncertainty and indecision and fear of doing wrong. But with a grown woman’s responsibility to be a mother to her own children. The uncertainty of how to balance these different roles is paralyzing.
I opened my Bible and found this, in 1 Samuel, 15:17. And Samuel said, Though you are little in your own eyes, are you not the head of the tribes of Israel? The Lord anointed you king over Israel.
The difficulties of navigating my roles and responsibilities as they relate to the people in this house are still there. They are still real. But my path forward seems more clear now. God has given me my own little tribe to guide, to teach, to raise and to love. And no matter how small my circumstances may make me feel, I have His strength to back me and my kingdom to rule over wisely and well.